Sample Bandit-ry |
Decorations supplied by the bandit. Rigging to block office door done by officemates who are funny after original event in question. |
Bandit Exhibit A |
Judge: State your case.
Prosecution: Your honor, at some point between 8 pm on Thursday, October 20th and 7 am on Friday, October 21st, the Halloween Office bandit struck a Santa Monica location.
Judge: Enough. Hasn't this happened before?
Prosecution: Yes, your honor. On record at least since 2009, this Halloween Bandit has spread gouhl-y spirit. It remains an open case, the Bandit has yet to be identified. Detectives believe to have multiple leads to the case but every year it remains a mystery... and then the bandit returns again. Cobwebs, spiders, pumpkins everywhere. Skeletons and trinkets on desk, just to rile up workers in every little way.
Judge: Well I'd say this bandit is good at what he/she does. Isn't this the point of the bandit? To remain unseen?
Prosecution: Why, yes, you may say so, your highness. However, prosecution is baffled by this yearly occurance and continues to seek answers!
Judge: Well who are your suspects?
Prosecution: Two main suspects, sir. One male, one female. Both likely have some part in the act, however both plead innocence.
Judge: And why do you suspect this duo?
Prosecution: After speaking to occupants of office and co-workers of said suspects, these two remain in question. Plus, concrete evidence of bandit-ry follow these individual's patterns.
Judge: How so?
Prosecution: You see, your highness, one office suspect, goes by Jessica, loves the dollar store the most of anyone in the office. All items (seen above) left by the bandit are in line with dollar store purchases.
Judge: And the other?
Prosecution: A male, sir. Blake. Of all officemates, this one has most loyalty to the office chalkboard (exhibit A, above).
Judge: Is this all the evidence you have, prosecution?
Prosecution: Yes, sir. This is all the evidence that the bandit leaves.
Prosecution: If it helps the case, sir, an official office poll taken revealed 8 votes for the male, 3 votes for the female, 5 votes for the male/female team.
Pause... and silence in the courtroom...
Judge: Remind me again why we are spending time on this?
Prosecution: Your honor, without your support and city and county resources designated to this effort, the bandit will strike again.
Judge: Well let the bandit be a bandit! Goul-y cheer among office mates does only good! Prosecution, case closed. Bandit strikes again! Enjoy the cheer, Prosecutor. The Bandit is out to do good!